SQUARE-1 BLOG

Author: Trisha Aure

It seems nowadays there are no safe places for thoughts, comments or posts.  There will always be someone that will have a negative response no matter what the content is.  I was reading a post on LinkedIn about a company that hired their first woman board member.  This is something that should definitely be talked about and celebrated.  But then I started reading the comments, and it was talking about everything this woman was not:
              “That’s great, but it would be better if she wasn’t Caucasian.”
              “How is she going to stand up to her male counterparts?”

Why can’t we see the actual message here instead of seeing everything that it is not?  What would life be if we celebrated what we should instead of tearing down things that don’t align with our personal goals?  We all have different goals, different paths and different stories.  And this is exactly as it should be.  We should be uplifting and supportive of one another, even when we disagree. 

Having a healthy mindset is not the easiest, and I have come to find out, this is an everyday activity.  I’m sure there are many speculations on why our minds are triggered to see the bad rather than the good.  The news, social media, celebrities, and pure gossip are just to name a few. 

I started thinking about this during a conversation I had with a friend of mine about my road rage.  I realized that I get frustrated when someone would cut me off or drive too slow because I would take it personally.  As though the driver saw me and said to himself “I’m going to cut that girl off…. haha.”  My friend put a bit of perspective out there for me and brought up that this person could be driving their hurt kid to the hospital or frantic because they received some heart wrenching news.  This struck home because it made me sound egotistical as though the world revolves around me; why did I think that? 

What does this negativity do to us?  It creates stress and an unhealthy lifestyle. 

“Emotional stress can weaken the immune system and cause high blood pressure, fatigue, depression, anxiety and even heart disease.”

In fact, it is estimated +75% of the physician office visits which occur in the USA annually are for stress related ailments.  It’s also the leading cause of death.  It’s a wonder why we react the way we do to certain actions is the first step.  We need to change our daily habits in order to begin a healthy lifestyle.  This can include:

• Getting regular physical activity
• Practicing relaxation techniques, such as deep breathing, meditation, yoga, tai chi or massage
• Keeping a sense of humor
• Spending time with family and friends
• Setting aside time for hobbies, such as reading a book or listening to music

Key Take Away
Slow down and live life.  Stop holding yourself back from happiness, success, family or anything else that you are striving to.  Stop worrying about things that are out of your control.  If it is out of your control, you can’t do anything about it, so why worry about it?  Why get upset about it?  Why lose sleep over it?  By taking stress out of your life, things won’t look as dull.  Our minds are so powerful, that if we train it to see things for what they really are it would be full of more rainbows than icy storms. 

Action Item
You don’t know everyone’s story and why people act the way they do.  We only have control over our own actions.  Instead of judging someone, talk to them, lend them a hand, or let them pass.  Humor is a big stress reliever for me.  You can’t stress when you are laughing.  If something works for you, share it.  Sharing is caring people.
 

How often do you hear someone say “I’m going to be (or am at present) great at my job”, yet when you begin to peel back the onion we learn the difference between being great professionally in the spoken word is often VERY different than being great in action and execution.

​Why is this?  For starters, it’s easy to say we want to be great in our career, achieving success along the way.  Make lots of money, have the prestigious title, corner office and be free in all sense of the word.

What isn’t so easy or talked about enough is what it actually takes to be successful in a career.  It’s also worth noting that success can be very different from one person to the next.

Behind the scenes, successful careers always have three things in common:
1. failure and set backs
2. strong work ethic
3. support

The reason why there is a discrepancy between the ‘talk and action’ paradigm to a successful career is it just isn’t easy to be successful.  If it was easy to be great in your career, reaching monumental levels, everyone would do it.  Yet, the reality is not everyone is interested in putting in that kind of work ethic or commitment, regardless of what their mouths may say.

Of the three commonalities which make up a successful career the one I’ve found to be most influential is #3: SUPPORT.  Most people who have reached success in their career will tell you they didn’t do it alone; what is common is to hear these people talk about others who have influenced them, guided them and been a shoulder to cry on during the hard times.

Want to become unstoppable in your career?  Get a MENTOR!

No matter where you are in your career having a mentor is highly advisable as it can be the difference between you navigating the waters of a successful career versus drowning in the murky depths of the rat race.  Mentors aren’t just strategic career advisers, they’re the professional voice of reason whispering notes of encouragement, big picture perspective and even accountability.

Mentors provide highly valuable insight and support to professionals of all ages, such as:
1. Business savvy
2. External perspective
3. Confidant (listener/ sounding board)
4. Accountability
5. Comfort zone demolishers

Key Take Away:  Mentors have the ability to guide you through the peaks and valleys of your career while providing you with insight that will help make important career-based decisions.

Action Item:  Put together a list of the attributes you would like to get help with in your professional career and the ideal type of person that could help you with it.  Check out www.micromentor.org for access to thousands of professionals interested in getting connected with you to help guide you on your professional journey.  Micromentor is a non-profit organization that acts like an online dating service paring people who are interested in mentoring with people who need a mentor.  I’ve been connected with a mentor now for almost 3 years and it was one of the best decisions I ever made in my professional career.

​I had always wanted to start a business!

For years I tried my hand at inventing stuff, products that I thought would get me rich, if I could only sell a few million of them.  First it was a gaming chair, then workout towels and even a handheld flashlight projector.  I laugh looking back on those days while in college and the years shortly thereafter at some of the absurd things I did to try and be entrepreneur. 

​What I would eventually find out are those ideas didn’t work out not because they were bad ideas necessarily but because I was following the wrong dream.

It wasn’t until the summer of 2015 that I would find my way, diving head first into entrepreneurship.  Thankfully I had a lot of help from many close people around me (wife, parents, friends) who all were incredibly supportive, as without them I’m not sure I would be here today. 

With the first year of entrepreneurship under the belt I’m continually amazed at how much I’ve learned and how much I continue to learn about being an entrepreneur and business in general.  These are the eight experiences I’ve had which made the biggest impact being an entrepreneur:

1.Get A Mentor
This is the single second best decision you’ll ever make in business.  The first best decision is to become an entrepreneur.  Mentors have experience which you can learn from helping you avoid mistakes along the way. 

2.Support Gets You Over The Hump
Make sure those close to you understand your vision and support it.  They don’t have to buy in 100% but if it’s you against the world there are going to be some very long nights in store.  If you are married it’s vital your spouse understands the opportunity and supports it, even in the down times.

3.Some Things CAN Wait
Some people will tell you it’s important to write a business plan, vision, mission, blah blah blah, right away.  Unless you’re in a situation where you need to ask for capital to start the business the best thing to do is put those things aside and focus all your efforts on how to make money.  Ultimately being an entrepreneur means you’re selling something to someone so the more time you spend on how you’re going to gett paid for the product or service you’re providing the better off you’ll be.

4.You Can’t Be Everything To Everyone
I failed miserably here.  When I did start to get customers I tried to offer everything under the sun to get their business.  Now, I never over promised and under delivered, however I spent an exorbitant amount of time in areas that weren’t lucrative or didn’t align ultimately with what the companies direction was.

5.Having A Plan-B Is Dangerous
I’ve read countless articles about “the power of having a ‘plan-B’ ” or an alternative course of direction.  I hate that advice.  As an entrepreneur if you don’t believe in what you’re doing and have a plan-B set up in case you fail you’re almost destined to set yourself up for disappointment.  I’m not saying it’s not important plan ahead for bumps in the road but if you’re going to start a business that should be your one and only focus.  Anything other than a mentality of success has no place in your new direction.  Visualize to materialize.

6.Outsource Work
The first several months I attempted to handle all the accounting and finance portions of the business only to realize two things: 1 – I’m not good at it nor do I like it; 2 – I created more problems than I remedied.  Best advice I got was to pay the money to get a good CPA that understood our business and could help us scale it up by making good decisions.  Best money I’ve ever spent was on our CPA.

7.The Power Of Saying ‘No’
Crucial to your success as an entrepreneur is the ability to politely and professionally say ‘no’.  Similar to ‘you can’t be everything to everyone’ saying ‘no’ is harder than it sounds.  Naturally you want to say yes to everyone, making everyone around you happy, especially if it’s a customer.  Unfortunately when we do this we get pulled in a hundred directions which causes us to deviate from our destined course.  If you are asked to do something and it doesn’t align with your top 2 or 3 priorities politely decline and thank the person for the opportunity to be considered.

8.Breathe, It’ll Be Okay
Very few things in life actually have the ability to stop you from moving forward in your new business.  When bumps in the road momentarily derail you (you will experience plenty of bumps along the way) take a deep breath and be thankful for the opportunity to learn and grow as a professional.  Stephen Covey put it best when he gave us the 90/10 principle:
 
“10% of life is made up of what happens to you, 90% of life is decided by how you react.” – Stephen Covey